Your opening line on your About Page probably starts off something like this:  “Hi!  I’m so-and-so, and I have been running Babycakes Bakery since 2010.  Baking is my passion!  In fact, I have been baking since I waschef 6 years old…  blah, blah, blah…

The problem?

Nobody cares.

I’m not trying to be a mean shitehead, but the plain, hard truth is nobody cares. They don’t care about you. They don’t care that you’re working hard every single day to make your business a success. They don’t care that what inspired to you start baking, or how long you’ve been baking.  They don’t care how darn cute you look with flour on your nose (harsh, right?Because you really do look irresistibly cute!).  It’s just that you’re not them.  People care about themselves.  Hey, it’s an innately human trait.  We’re all kinda faulty like that. 

So make them care first.  And make them care by talking about THEM.  Then introduce yourself and tell them a little about you.  But keep it brief!  As humans, our attention span is miniscule.  Keep it short before your rapt reader becomes zoned-out zombie and moves on. 

And please, of please, don’t write about yourself in the third person.  You’re you—approachable, fun, friendly, and REAL– so craft your writing like you’d chat to your friends.  Would you ever refer to yourself in the third person when talking?  If you do, stop it right now, you weirdo. Just kidding!  Sort of. 

robot-161368_150Avoid stilted writing—like the plague … or your creepy neighbour.  Don’t write like a robot.  Don’t write like you’re producing an English paper.  So have that shot of vodka (just one!  Ok, two tops!).  Sip a glass of wine. Relax, and imagine you’re sitting in your living room, chatting to your best friend. That’s the tone you want to come across. It seems that a lot of people avoid this tone because they think it doesn’t sound “professional”. But it’s precisely the conversational style of writing that makes you approachable and relatable–like a real, live human person. 

Include photos of yourself—more than one if you can.  Not a selfie that you took in the mirror.  Not a weird “I’m trying to look sexy” photo.  Whatever you do, don’t purse or pout your lips.  Don’t show a whack of cleavage.  And guys, put on a shirt for crying out loud.  Get professional photos

Get professional photos if at all possible.  It truly makes a difference between looking hokey and half-assed, or polished and professional. Plus, there’s PHOTOSHOP people!  Your photographer can do some slick editing to make you look like you’re ready for the cover of Vogue (or GQ for the fellas!). Giddy up!

Samples of About Pages from actual websites that are NOT customer centered:

**Note:  names and dates have been changed to protect the innocent

Jane Doe Design Inc. is not preoccupied with creating our own “signature style”, but provide design solutions that create each client’s unique style, which reflects their taste and personality. We are problem solvers and committed to providing excellent service to our clients, who use, visit and inhabit the interior environments that we create.

The Jane Doe Bakery has been owned and operated by Jane and John Doe since 1998. For 15 years they have been proudly serving delicious fresh baked breads, cakes and cookies. In 2012 they expanded their product line to include in store made perogies, using the same high standards and home style recipes. 

John Doe, a wedding photographer based in Mongolia, is a qualified member of the Mongolian Institute of Professional Photography (MIPP). With over 20 years experience in portraiture and wedding photography, he has photographed a range of weddings and social events throughout Mongolia and internationally.

Jane Doe Interiors has been designing for residential and commercial clients since January 1994. We offer expertise to commercial and residential clients to include the development of the design concept, design and drafting of construction plans, selection and specification of interior finishes, design and coordination of interior details and trim, electrical and lighting layouts, space planning,

Notice that there are a lot of “we” statements in the above About Pages.  Not very customer focused.  Not sure why little dude looks so happy about it.   

 

 

 

Now, these companies have done their About Page the right way. So they get mad props with a link to their awesome websites and a basket of muffins (ok, there really aren’t any muffins):

 

Alycia Hall – Vancouver Life Coach

Hey gorgeous!  Are you in a place where you feel stuck and don’t know what direction to go in?  Yeah?  well, you’ve come to the right place.

It takes courage to do what YOU are here to do … and I believe you are here to do something big.

http://www.alyciahall.com/

Alejandra Ortega – Business Strategist/Virtual Assistant

Maybe you tried getting help in the past … but it was just … well … unhelpful.

Or maybe you’re just getting to that point now … where you would like to bounce ideas off of someone … someone you trust … someone that gets you.

Or maybe you’ve had some level of success … but aren’t sure where to go from here (Hellooooo overwhelm).

Whatever the case may be, if you want someone to share the “work” side of your business, organize your processes and offerings, and experience the freedom of knowing you are not along in this–you’ve come to the right place.

http://alejandraortega.com/about/ 


Island Business Print Group – Printing, Promotional & Branding (Victoria, BC)

When was the last time you experienced exceedingly exceptional customer service?

When did a business you deal with make you feel as special and important as you aspire to make your own customers feel?  Is the art of customer service dead? Deceased? Dearly departed?

At Island Business Print Group, we want to resuscitate your faith in mind-blowing customer service.  No defibrillator paddles or high voltage necessary!

http://islandprintgroup.com/island-print-group-story/

Charissa Moore – Intuitive Lifestyle Blogger

You’re sassy, sarcastic, and have that “cup half full” mentality. Unless it’s five in the morning. Or you’re camping.

You’re the one that your girlfriends ask for advice. You’re the shoulder to cry on, and the girl that cleans up after the house party you were invited to. You’re reliable.  Loyal, even.

To the world, you are perfect.  And all this is all fine and well …

… but there’s kind of a big problem:  You sometimes feel like a poser.

You ignore that voice in your head, telling you to walk away.

And–full disclosure–you roll your eyes when that friend pops up on caller ID, debating which issue she wants you to weigh in on.

You want to feel free, bold, and genuine … but you have no idea where to begin.

http://www.charissa.im/about/

How amazing are those?  Just count the number of yous! Do you read those and see yourself?  Feel yourself?   

The idea is to strike an emotional cord with the people who clap their eyes on your About Page.  Make them care.  Let them know you understand them and what they are going through, or what they’re looking for—and the seeds for the genesis of a relationship have been planted.  Honesty, consistency, and communication will all build trust, likeability, and loyalty.  And once you’ve got those customers, don’t get lazy—continue to make them feel special.  Every year, when I get a birthday card from my mortgage broker, with that little note about how she made a donation on my behalf to my favourite animal charity, well, I’m just putty in her hands.       

  

RECAP AND NIGHTCAP

TIPS FOR AN AWESOME ABOUT PAGE …

Make an emotional connection

Focus on your customer/client first

Write in the first person

Avoid stilted, robotic writing

Get professional photos (or at least an amateur with a good camera)

Have a glass of wine, relax, and have fun writing it!

owl-158415_640

So have a look at your About Page, give it a little love, and see what changing the focus can do for your business.  Burning questions?  Looking for a rewrite while you watch the newest episode of the Blacklist?  Just drop me a line.  Ciao!